Earlier I asked, What If? In that post I said I need to learn how to be me and to see myself as God does. Though I believed I knew what I meant, did I?
I think I’m still learning that it is difficult to be me, in that I want to live as God wants me to, but often I’m afraid I’ll do something, say something, not do or say something that will give someone offense or cause others to think I’m not being Christ-like enough. I may ask myself, “If I say that, will people think I’m too much into myself?” or think, “I can’t say that because someone may think I’m being deceived by the world and having polluted thoughts.”
Whether these thoughts are the truth or not doesn’t matter. They keep me from being who I truly am, thus there is the need to know how to live as me.
God, I believe, does not want template Christians in the world, but people who can act without the fear of failure, because we are definitely “faulty,” and therefore cannot be the perfect template. By trying to live that perfectly straight-lined Christian life, I’m not accepting that, “Of course I’m not perfectly anything. I'm continually learning, growing closer to God, and simply living!” The focus should not be on trying to be that perfect citizen of God, but on reaching out to people to let them know that despite our imperfections and “faultiness,” God is always there to correct us, guide us, keep us in line with him, and erase our mistakes through his grace.
We plant the seeds that can lead people to Christ, but it is God who does the work! It seems to be only arrogance and a sense of self-righteousness that causes me to think I can’t be who I am for fear that people will see that I am not perfect. Definitely I am not and never will be, so why should I fear this? God knows my heart, knows my will, knows where I need help, and he never fails us and never lets us down! By and through God will I learn to live as who I am!
So, especially to my Facebookers, if it seems my statements may become slightly different, not so self-controlled, and maybe even seem a little worldly, please just know that I am learning. I am learning how to be me in Christ.