Journal Past Blast blog hop ~ Staying on track

The more I look into my old journals, the more nervous I become about these Tuesday postings. But, it's been decided and I plan to stay on track! I invite any brave souls to join in as a blog hop and post old journal entries or any old writings. Just snag the above button and join in using the Linky below.

Today’s posting is from my most eclectic journal, one I’m sure I’ll use the most. I hate that so many of my entries are not dated, and I don't remember writing this one. But I know I wrote this sometime in college, where I was at from 1986 to 1990:

Before setting the lit match on the gasoline soaked house, Edward knelt down and kissed the first step of the porch. He looked up and saw the child’s eyes gazing down at him from the upstairs bedroom. Already the flames brushed just under the open window.

The child was smiling because it knew the end was coming. Edward was crying for he knew his life would begin. Unleashed were the wondrous cries of a man set free of the pained desires of dependency.

The murder was done, and Edward’s soul was set free. Death brought life for those caught in the middle

First the long hair of the child caught on fire until its whole body was enveloped. Edward felt the two fiery spheres of its eyes piercing his soul until the last sparkle dimmed black with lavish death. And Edward became Edwin, with a new beginning and end. The treacherous child inside was no more, its charred face crumbled down into its bowels, excreting out into nothingness.

The house turned into another form, drenched with birthing water in a pond of nourishing liquid for Edwin’s new life.

This entry ended with this:

How is one supposed to write a story when confusion reeks in every part of her soul?