Tuesday, May 7, 2013

Coming Out From The Past - A Writer's Old Journaling

The S post of the A to Z Challenge (this one) got me thinking about the past a lot – the post where I spoke about how an old friend and I were caught shoplifting in our youth. 

I did go to her old house and was surprised to learn that her parents still live there. My friend wasn’t there, but one of her sisters was. It turns out that my friend lives just a block away from my mom, she works at a high school in Hayward, the city I live, and her other sister works as a probation officer like I do. How things go is just funny to me! I mean, I hadn’t seen her in about 30 years.

I left my phone and email with the mom, but of course I ended up writing the wrong number! But she did email me and I sent her the right number. I’m looking forward to catching up with her.

Well, this got me the idea to go over some old journals and to post some things here. Some journal entries are VERY personal, not to mention show me in a vulnerable light. But, it seemed like an interesting idea. Here goes.

This is something I wrote years ago that I don’t even remember writing. (I’m sure there are at least a few journal entries I won’t remember having written!) It’s not dated, but the entry before that was on 12/6/97. Unfortunately, nothing after that was dated, so it’s hard to say if this was also written in 1997 or not. Since this journal entry was about writing, I thought it would make for a great start to this weekly theme. Hopefully soon I'll come up with a label and badge for these Tuesday posts.

When A Writer Creates

It’s the act of creating, like drawing and even doing jigsaw puzzles. It’s seeing how something is created from nothing or from jumbled things. The act of putting letters, words, sentences, paragraphs on paper is a beautiful experience to me. And then seeing, reading, what comes out of it… if it’s something good, it’s magnificent. If it’s bad, it’s still something to be at least a little proud of, even if a little ashamed of also.

It’s a great feeling to realize you’re the only one who’ve thought to write this story, character, this trouble. Although I hate when people say this, you feel almost godlike. You’ve created a world, people, lives, interactions, love, hate, murder, just simple pleasures like enjoying how vanilla ice cream melts in your mouth. You made that person who enjoyed that. You’ve created someone who dies a horrid death… yet no one has been hurt.

Maybe from the outcome, someone’s been moved, touched, made to understand something that nothing else in life has made him understand. Writing can give someone a reason to get up in the morning when they just have to find out, What happens next…?

It’s a way of creating that pits your wits against your experiences, which results in as great a creation or feeling of love as rearing a beloved child. It seems almost out of your control how it finally turns out.

This writing came from this journal. I liked sketch books because they didn't have lines and writing was more free flowing. I didn't have much in this journal, only a few entries, which is why it's hard to be sure when the above writing was written.

15 comments:

  1. I think it is really cool that you went to your friend's old house to try to get reacquainted! It is also a great idea to post old journal entries. I might have to do that someday, too.

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    1. Thanks Melody. I'm glad this idea came to me. It was hard to figure out what to do after the A to Z Challenge. I think I was stymied for a bit. :)

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  2. It's always great to reconnect with old friends :)

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  3. so I guess she is finally transformed from a person of "saving face" to saving grace" :) have a wonderful catch-up!

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    1. We were so young when that happened. I tell you, I could never write a memoir, as I'd be terrified that my memory and interpretation of something that happened would be so off and offend others. But that was my honest take on that situation that happened so many years ago.

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  4. I don't really like the "god-like" phrase either, even though it's true...

    I've read some of my journal entries from a few years ago. *Cringe* I was so dramatic sometimes :D

    I couldn't write in a sketchbook. I like everything to stay in a straight line. That's the ocd in me I suppose.

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    1. Yes, I'm sure there will be some cringe episodes as I read through my journals. :)

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  5. I love Julia Cameron's thought on God being the ultimate Creator and creating us to, yes, create. It's our gift back.

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    1. I'd never heard that. I do like it as well.

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  6. Cool that you decided to reconnect and thanks for sharing your journal entry with us.

    Excerpt: It’s a way of creating that pits your wits against your experiences, which results in as great a creation or feeling of love as rearing a beloved child. It seems almost out of your control how it finally turns out.

    So true and if you try to force an ending it's never as good as letting go and letting the story decide.

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    1. Yes, and some times the storyline that develops just breaks your heart, but there's really nothing that can be done about it without destroying the integrity of it.

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  7. Great idea to post on old journal entry. I enjoyed it, and I agree... even if its bad, we deserve to be proud to even attempt it ;)

    You are such a wonderful person for trying to reconnect with your old friend, have fun catching up!

    PS I you've been nominated for a few awards on my blog...

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  8. I discovered recently that the elderly man who lives around the corner was married to a woman who, as a girl, used to come and care for her granny when she lived in what is now our house. I asked him if he wanted to come and have a look round for old times' sake, but he declined, saying it would be sad for him if the place didn't look as he remembered it. He said that he and his young lady used to come and 'do a bit of courting' in the front room when granny was having a nap!

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    1. That's an amazing story! You never know how people will react to the past. Thanks for sharing this. :)

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